names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
