so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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