absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
