based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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