tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize