You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
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I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
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how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
The convent might be a nice break from real life
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Never joke about your clitoris.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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