At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
