I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize
