Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
