i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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