So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
smell my finger.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
