I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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