I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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