its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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