Don't you send me to vm
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
