I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I understand Curling. That high.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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