I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
