Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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