I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize