Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
The adults are the big ones right?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
