I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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