I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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