we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
