so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
