U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
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