She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
