I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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