so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
God, I missed his penis.
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