So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
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