Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
