Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize