fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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