Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
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