Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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