is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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