I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Randomize
