Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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