Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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