Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
yeah, it was that bad.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
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The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me