Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
