Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
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Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
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It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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