Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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