Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Randomize
