I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
