Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
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