What tipped you off? The sombrero?
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
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