I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
