btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
