just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize