ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
