my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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